What do you do when your emotions collide in your head?
It's like being in the eye of a storm or waves crashing against the rocks.
I'm not happy or sad, but happy and sad.
Some emotions often come in pairs, like being nervous and excited. When that happens we can have nervous energy or a strange feeling within our stomachs.
A lot of people also say that nerves are a sign that you care, but I don't believe that. The more you practice and more experience you have you may experience this less. This doesn't mean you care any less, you are more confident at doing it. But then some people never lose that feeling in their stomachs.
So whilst I don't believe it, I don't disbelieve it either. Like many things, its really personal.
The mixture of emotions I am feeling right now reminds me of this character from the Pixar movie Inside Out. As one emotion comes from the left side of my head the opposing emotion comes from the right side. When they combine, the fire happens and it's a very strange feeling.
I feel let down, angry, sad, nervous, sick and like it's the end of a big chapter of my life. But I feel excited, happy, joyful, excited and also like it's an opportunity that I should be grateful for.
This gives me a banging headache, impacts my ability to focus and concentrate, I feel physically sick and I know that this feeling won't go away until I know what happens next.
It is a strong sense of uncertainty.
What frustrates me is that the situation was avoidable.
I am left with this unknown feeling over the weekend when I should have more information by now.
Organisations and individuals need to do better with situations like this. They have a responsibility to deliver news in a timely fashion to minimise the risk to peoples wellbeing.
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